"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
