i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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