i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
