all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize
