My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
