just come out here and I will go home with you...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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