I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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