THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
