I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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