its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize