i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Randomize
