I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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