Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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