My brain says no but my pants say off.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
