Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
