sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
it's great music for shaving your balls
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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