I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
