Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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