matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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