O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
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