I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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