I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
