Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
