margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
