Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
