Just mADE A PArabola og urine
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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