He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
