he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
We got so high we made milksteak
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
