No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
