he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
