I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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