The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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