Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
