guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
