I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Randomize
