I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
