I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
