I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
