Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
