She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
