Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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