your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
