if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
only you would photoshop your dick
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
