if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
