Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home

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(708): View more from Illinois

Crying babies in a bar. Really?

(708): View more from Illinois

And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.

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(301): View more from Maryland

this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.

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(678): View more from Georgia

Someone shattered a urinal.

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(228): View more from Mississippi

There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.

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(586): View more from Michigan

My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?

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