It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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