U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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