Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
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