Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Randomize
