I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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